How to Remove Phlegm from Dog Feet



Posted: Tuesday, June 10, 2008

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One of the "perks" of living in Korea is the daily hopscotch you get to do to avoid the various chunky puke puddles and the jiggly, quivering globs of phlegm . I'm quite used to watching where I walk and very, very, very rarely step in anything (unless there is just no other way to proceed). The dogs, however, don't share my squeamishness. Walking through things that rate high on my ick scale is not something that they think twice about.

So, sometimes, when I am washing their feet after we come in (I'll bet that now everyone completely understands why I think this is necessary), I get that familiar slimy, gooey, feeling in my hand that you usually only get when you blow your nose during a bad cold and the tissue fails to hold it all and you end up with it in your hand. Except, this isn't your own snot...this is some stranger's "lung butter". And it is much thicker in consistency than the average snot during a cold. This is cold, nasty and almost spongy in texture and you don't know how sick the person was who coughed it up and spat it out. And, not only is this on your dog's foot, but you've got to use your very own hands to get it off.

First, let me tell you from experience, that using your own fingers to repeatedly try to pull it off just won't work. Somehow, it clings. Perhaps the slimy texture is what prevents you from getting a good hold on it. I still find it amazing that something so slimy can be so sticky at the same time.

Soap will not work. You can try dog shampoo, your own soap...it is not going to break down the mucous glob. For the longest time, up until yesterday that is, I would settle in for a good 10 minutes of washing the guilty dog's foot and trying not to feel like puking when I manage to remove a long strand of phlegm and watch it swish its way to the drain. I thought there was no other way.

However, yesterday, I finally had an epiphany. Soap doesn't work...perhaps something gritty would. Since I use baking soda to wash my hair, naturally I had a container of it in the bathroom. I quickly ordered the dog to stay and not make a bolt for freedom and poured a good amount of baking soda into my hand. Then I commenced with scrubbing his foot. It did not hurt him in the slightest...he appeared to believe he was getting a rather marvelous foot massage and closed his eyes in pleasure. The phlegm came off! This was the fastest way I've ever been able to remove a phlegm glob from a dog foot....and this foot happened to have a lot of hair in the pad as he was long overdo for a foot trim. ( Phlegm tends to cling to hair and make removal even more difficult than when the foot has been freshly shaven.)

So, if your dogs ever step in phlegm , you now know a wonderful way to remove it.

After teaching English in South Korea for nearly ten years, Ulrike Neville is back in the States re-learning how to be an American, albeit one who doesn't exactly qualify for mainstream.

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